My husband Bill works at the check-in counter for an airline. Recently he came home and told me about this interaction.
A young man approached the counter and Bill determined quickly that this customer was likely someone with some cognitive delay.
Bill: “I see here Joseph* that you’re going to ‘town’, is that right?”
Joseph: “Yes”
Bill: “Are you going to need any help getting to your gate?”
Joseph: pause “My dad says he has total confidence in me”
Bill: “I have total confidence in you too.”
Bill said that it didn’t seem like Joseph had total confidence in himself, but that he knew that his dad did.
First, that is very sweet, and second I see what a wonderful tool Joseph’s father had given him.
One of the best gifts we can give to those around us is our confidence in their ability. The best gift we can give ourselves is confidence in our ability. There have been countless times when I have done something that was new or scary, and I can say with assurance that a trusted someone’s faith in me boosted my own faith.
There is the common saying ‘fake it til you make it’ I don’t really like this because it seems false, like you’re pretending. I prefer ‘faith it til you make it.’ Subtle but powerful difference, even if all you have is 1% belief that you’re going to make it, that’s enough. Someone else’s sliver of belief is enough.
Joseph’s father knows this. When Joseph is walking into the airport of his layover, he knows his dad has confidence in him. That’s not to say he might not need help, but the attitude he approaches the situation is from a can-do place.
You’ve likely met someone as I have who has had the opposite experience, of being told that they didn’t have the ability to achieve. This can be very hard to overcome or learn to not believe.
Let’s help those near to us achieve their best. Let’s notice the language we use towards others and ourselves. Let’s have our focus be on the chance of success and allow it to grow.
Let’s use our words to imbue confidence like Joseph’s dad.
I believe in you!
*Not his real name